In the military we know a fair amount about boundaries. To get on post, we have to go through a check point before we can cross the “boundary” onto the base. These boundaries are usually crystal clear to anyone wanting to pass. An MP in a uniform and a sidearm are usually a good indication.
Not so with us personally though. Setting a boundary with other people can be difficult. First you have to know what a boundary is and often we are not taught those things in the guise of raising us to be nice, loving, sensitive and considerate people. A boundary is a clear explanation of what is and is not acceptable in a relationship. Here’s the kicker. Everyone’s idea of boundaries is different. And just to make it more interesting boundaries can change over time. Someone who has been recently hurt or injured physically or emotionally may have their guard up and let no one in. This is an example of extreme boundaries. Someone who is in a long term relationship, safe and happy let’s down their guard and relaxes their boundaries. Sound confusing? It is for most of us.
Being straightforward and letting those around you know clearly what is and what is not acceptable to you can make living in tight quarters or in stressful situations more manageable. It lets everyone know, including yourself what is tolerable to you so that others can respect those rules and we can all get along better.
Independent filmmaker, author, happiness coach and speaker Lisa Cypers Kamen creates these blogs to entertain, enlighten and educate our service men and women along with their families as well as support our troops. To contact Lisa, email her directly at firstname.lastname@example.org and check out her websites at www.whatisyourhappiness.com , www.harvestinghappiness.com , and www.hh4heroes.org and listen to her on www.harvestinghappinesstalkradio.com or download her show at www.itunes.com.
Harvesting Happiness with Lisa Cypers Kamen brings to the airwaves a fresh talk radio approach promoting happiness, well-being and global human flourishing by presenting a diverse and proactive collection of the greatest thinkers and doers who have devoted their lives to creating a better world in which to live. She is an expert in creating happiness, finding pathways to happiness, and building a happiness formula in her happiness workshops. If you are looking for how to become a happier person, tune in weekly at www.toginet.com Wednesday’s at 12:00 pm to 1:00 pm EST.
Harvesting Happiness for Heroes is a pending 501(c)(3), non-profit corporation. Our mission objective is to offer support services to Warriors and Warrior families challenged by Combat Trauma, PTSD and post-deployment reintegration issues. We offer Battle Buddy workshops, family awareness training, online community support, one-on-one coaching services, as well as retreats for Warriors to decompress from battle and understand the tools available for them to adapt their military skills to civilian society.
Harvesting Happiness & Harvesting Happiness for Heroes provides positive psychology coaching tools to facilitate greater well-being. This communication is provided for education and inspiration. This communication does not constitute mental health treatment nor is it indicative of a private therapeutic relationship. Individuals desiring help for trauma, addiction and abuse related issues or other psychological concerns should seek out a mental health professional.
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